Arkansas Lawmakers Propose Vital, Urgent, and Completely Pointless Resolutions

Yes, dear voters, the legislative body is hard at work, not on solving any of the state’s problems, but on reminding you—through legally toothless resolutions—which issues you should and should not support.

During the special session to help the poor rich folk get richer, Representative Ryan Rose presented a dazzling piece of oratory against the Arkansas Abortion Amendment. Rose reminded us that Arkansas is, was, and forever shall be the #1 pro-life state. His stirring resolution firmly encourages you to vote against the amendment. We will definitely listen to this random dude tell us what to do with our vote—why not!?

Representative Brit McKenzie (R-Rogers) introduced a resolution against the Arkansas Educational Rights Amendment. McKenzie’s theatrical proclamation that this amendment is “misleadingly titled” was met with all the enthusiasm of a mandatory meeting on paperclip procurement.

These brave Arkansas legislators are screaming into the void, ensuring their meaningless resolutions get the airtime they don’t deserve. We are certain, too, that Arkansans are eagerly awaiting the sage advice of these lawmakers. Please help us think, legislators! We cannot do it ourselves.

Or maybe the resolutions are some kind of Uno-reverse strategy to draw attention to the very initiatives they oppose. The surest way to make something popular is to have a politician tell you it’s bad.

We digress. Thanks, ARleg, for your commitment to distraction.