SHS holds press conference, does her best on Canva

Sarah’s education plan has evolved from a mere acronym to an infographic with the essence of a Waffle House menu. No really, it’s uncanny. And we heard all about it at a press conference on Wednesday.

The high points (or low, as the case may be) are found below.

Sanders will:

1. Fail third graders who can’t read 
2. Give teachers a raise, but make it easier to fire them unfairly
3. Require high school students to provide 75 hours of free labor
4. Create a caste system among teachers, rewarding only those she deems worthy
5. Defund public education via vouchers to private schools

Of course, all this could just be a publicity stunt to ride the wave of her national TV appearance the night before, as there is still no bill to be seen.